Back in 2013, Michelle Ingenthron was chatting with colleagues about the difficulty of finding a surrogate to carry her baby when Marcella Sisneros – unmistakably with child – walked by.
“You should ask her to do it,” a friend bantered. “She gets pregnant so easily.”
It was just a joke. Although they occasionally passed in the hallways at Fountain Valley Regional Hospital, the two women hardly knew each other. Ingenthron works as a labor and delivery nurse, and Sisneros as a secretary in the neonatal intensive care unit.
Yet five years after that prophetic intersection of paths, Sisneros, 32, gave birth to Ingenthron’s daughter Josephine – now a curious, cherubic 8-month-old.
Today, the coworkers are bosom buddies, experiencing together some of life’s most poignant moments.
They cried in each other’s arms when an attempted pregnancy didn’t happen and again when another did. They held hands listening to the fetal heartbeat and, later, marveling over the first ultrasound. Most amazingly, they shared the joy of welcoming Josephine into the world.
“I have always wanted to be a mom, and it’s even better than I ever imagined,” said Ingenthron, 40.
Josephine’s middle name is JiaQi, Chinese for “miracle.”
That sweet miracle is the product of patience, determination and generosity – with credit due, in no small part, to the husbands who also made her possible.
For Ingenthron, carrying a child to term would be far too risky. She underwent a kidney transplant in 2005 and must take medication to keep her body from rejecting it.
At work, Ingenthron felt the irony – and, at times, pain – of helping others give birth while she couldn’t.
“The hardest thing was when a woman on drugs came in to have her second or third baby that immediately would go into foster care,” she said. “It didn’t seem fair.”
In 2012, Ingenthron began the expensive and arduous process of egg retrieval from her ovaries. She and her husband, who live in Huntington Beach, also looked into surrogacy agencies but were deterred by the price tag.
“It would’ve cost another $100,000,” said Matthew Ingenthron, 43, a software engineer.
By sheer serendipity, Sisneros was, in fact, open to the idea of serving as a surrogate. “My job in NICU made me think, ‘Why not help someone out?’” she said. She mentioned that sentiment to office pals, who told her about Ingenthron,
Before offering her womb, Sisneros needed to bring her husband on board. “At first I was, what?” Louis Garbutt recalled. “Then I said, ‘Well, what’s another nine months?’ I just asked that we complete our own family first.”
So Sisneros presented the proposal to Ingenthron, whose initial reaction was, “Are you really serious?”
After the birth of their third child in 2015, Sisneros told Ingenthron she and her husband were ready to move forward.
Moving forward meant that the Lakewood couple first must submit to a psychiatric evaluation to establish that surrogacy was right for them. One topic addressed: What if the baby is a girl? As the parents of three sons, might they wish she was theirs?
“We are happy to have all boys,” said Garbutt, 34, a technician. “We wouldn’t know what to do with a girl.”
Then came the toughest leg of the journey: intensive hormone therapy to prepare Sisneros’ body for an embryo. “I gained 30 pounds before I even got pregnant,” she said.
Sisneros and Ingenthron were both at work when they learned the first try didn’t succeed. Sobbing together in the locker room, Sisneros promised, “We’ll do this as many times as it takes.”
And in late 2017, an embryo indeed implanted.
The friends verified that fact before their doctors did. They had been warned against taking the word of an over-the-counter pregnancy test.
“But we cheated,” Ingenthron said. “I couldn’t wait two weeks for the next appointment.”
Only two days after the embryo transfer, Sisneros ducked into a restroom to perform the forbidden test. Without looking, she wrapped the stick in toilet paper and presented it to the mother-to-be like a gift. Together, they saw the pink line and cheered.
Sisneros elected to use the same Fountain Valley Regional obstetrician who delivered her children. Ingenthron accompanied her to every visit.
As her belly expanded, Sisneros needed to explain the unusual arrangement to her oldest son, then 10. “He was OK with it once I assured him the baby would not live with us,” she said.
The big day, Aug. 23, finally came – with surrogate couple, biological parents and grandmothers all crammed into the delivery room. A perfect blend of her parents, Josephine arrived weighing 7 pounds, 2 ounces.
“Louis said, ‘That’s all? Our babies were over 8 pounds,’” Sisneros said.
“Oh, she’s just fine – look at her now,” said Ingenthron, squeezing a delightfully chubby thigh.
Sisneros’ job is not quite done. She pumps and freezes milk daily, relaying bottles to Ingenthron at work.
Any chance of a repeat? Both couples burst into laughter at the familiar question.
“Matt’s mom recently told us, ‘If you need some money for another baby, let us know,’” Michelle Ingenthron said.
“Nana wants to buy another grandchild,” her husband quipped.
Whatever the future may bring, Josephine radiates enough cuteness for a dozen babies.
“She’s always happy,” her mom said, describing something shared by everyone involved. “Happy, happy, happy.”